The Anger.

The way I discovered my inner hurt was from the severe anger I experienced. I still fight with it, "during that time of the month", if you know what I mean, but nothing like I used to. I would be just fine and with no warning for me or anyone else, I would be in an outrage. My heart would beat so fast, I was irrational, just out of control. So what else could I do but run to Christ. That was the ticket. The ticket to freedom. I knew something was wrong, because Jeremy would say what's wrong, and I had no answer. It was easy to find an excuse, but I knew deep down the truth was that I didn't know why I was so angry. I don't remember when, but I'm sure it was the holy spirit leading me, but one day I was in a rage, and I don't know if I blew up or not, but I went to God with it, and it was like a dam broke. I sobbed and sobbed and he began to show me just how deeply I had been hurt. For the first time I had sympathy for myself. I liked to pretend I was tough, that was one of my covers, but I was (and still am), a needy child of God. He revealed the lie that, "it was no big deal" and showed me the truth that it was a huge, soul damaging, deal.
In our darkest hour if we'll only come to him, he will lead us down the path of righteousness. I learned that the hard way. The Devil loves to make me forget with distractions, but Jesus prevails every time!! Praise God.